When will the stars be aligned?

A year is ending soon again.
I am still shielding myself from the light.
A year plus of ME time.
I did a lot of reflections and did many things on my own.
That i'm stronger now?
It's still the old me,
just that i felt that time is stripping me
my little bit of sunshine as years goes by.
The kid in me, the craziness in me, the playful me
seems to be disappearing bit by bit.
And i find it really hard to trust.
I guess the secrets has to stay with me for a long long time.